This was an April Fool’s, but the games are very much real! Check out the hundreds of Type-in Programs members of Gaming Alexandria have preserved!
It is a little known fact that Gaming Alexandria is the direct successor to the Library of Alexandria, the best known repository for knowledge in the ancient world. While some have argued the place of the Library in pop culture is exaggerated, we nevertheless carry on the mission to preserve every scrap that enters our harbor! Or at least, what we can scan.
But we’ve been holding something back from you. We’ve been embarking on dangerous missions into the heart of game preservation and we’ve uncovered something incredible! After many Indiana Jones-esque escapades into forgotten archaeological sites, we can finally reveal our treasure trove: Hundreds of lost games from a forgotten civilization!
These artifacts largely originate from the Typein Dynasty, a lost society that communicated strictly in code. The primary dialect of the Typein Dynasty was called BASE IKK, though there was also a more complex language called HEKKA DES I-MAIL which was sometimes used. Our volunteer “Assemblers” reconstructed the code from textual fragments spread across many archaeological sites and learned the fascinating history of these forgotten people!
As opposed to most written records, which are usually composed by an elite class, Typein Dynasty records were largely composed by ordinary people: like us. They submitted these texts (called LISS TINGS) to priests who collected them in sacred volumes (ZEENZ) which were distributed throughout their society. When a recipient, or KOE DER, received their volume, they would translate the information through a ritual we don’t quite understand. Once they did, they had a playable game.
Though we may not know everything about these original rituals, the Assemblers of Gaming Alexandria have managed to recreate much of the translation process! The many varieties of the Typein dialects has necessitated us to use many different computer platforms to recreate these games. Somehow, we are able to emulate the originals almost perfectly – save for correcting a few typos in the original text.
The end results have been compiled into a collection that you can access on our site! If you want to become a fellow Assembler, you can join the fine talks on the #typingtaskforce channel on our Discord; the process is actually relatively simple! We even have a scoreboard. Using these ancient records, we have resurrected hundreds of games that we previously could not play.
This Tape is from the Library of Gaming Alexandria
This phrase adorns every new game we bring back from the Typein Dynasty, and we hope you try them out!
We also discovered something more mysterious.
One of our researchers who went on a perilous expedition to a forgotten island in the Typein region came into the library a few days ago. He threw this paper on our desk and ran away, screaming in terror.
We believe this relates to a mythical entity of the Typein era, whose name we’ve reconstructed as FLA’TS’OH. This terrifying being was prophesized to be the end of their civilization – his hunger so great that he would consume the sacred Zeenz.
While cryptic, we intend to look into this further. The more superstitious librarians are frightful that Fla’ts’oh may rise again… But we’re sure it will be fine.
Thanks to Hubz, Quarterpast, and Kao for their contributions.
